“Why am I single?” or “why am I still single?”. Those are two of the most common questions people aged between 25 and 35 ask themselves. If you are also asking yourself this question, here you might find the answer.
Why am I single? Reason n.1: Something is missing
Something is missing within your life. It isn’t about anybody else. It is about the relationship you have with yourself. Sexual energy is the energy which permeates everything in existence. In essence, sexual energy is creative energy.
If you are wondering where your beloved it is, if you are wondering why you haven’t met the dream woman or the dream man, don’t worry because your time will come. So many people want a quick fix, but the greatest relationship you can have is with yourself.
You have to embrace yourself. You have to love yourself before you can love anybody else. Once you accept yourself 100%, your flaws, your gifts and your talents, then you begin to accept other people’s flaws, gifts and talents because nobody is perfect.
Why am I single? Reason n.2: No one is perfect
Perfectionism is a cuss. You have to accept that there is no dream person. It doesn’t exist. You have to take on board the good, the bad and the ugly. Many people who are still single have a checklist.
Ultimately we are all looking for our reflection. We are looking for the other part of ourselves, which is on a deeper level our highest self. Once you tap into your highest self, the marriage takes place within yourself. The union of the body and the mind. True marriage is within yourself and then when you meet someone else, the two wholes become complete.
You can’t be fragmented. You can’t be half looking for another half because then there are two incomplete halves.
Why am I single? Reason n.3: Timing
If you are still single, remember that there are times, seasons and cycles within your life. It may not be tomorrow that you may find your partner. When you accept the circle of life, you have to let go of expectations, you have to let go of the calendar.
Many people live in a society of instant gratification. Love doesn’t work like that. Meeting someone else takes a tremendous amount of time in terms of developing a deeper intimacy with someone. To do that, you have to completely surrender to yourself.
The more you tap into who you are, the more you become whole, the more you will attract people to you. And you will also attract your reflection.
We attract what we are. What we send out is what we attract. Sometimes you need time to find yourself. You need time to discover your true authentic being.
Many people who are single right now, are single because they are focusing their energy on developing their clarity and inner balance. When they do meet that person, they know instantly because they’ve done the inner work.
Why am I single? Reason n.4: You don’t own anybody
Once you work on yourself, don’t search for someone else. You don’t have to search. You have to let go of that sense of urgency, of panic and anxiety that you are going to lose something.
You can only lose what doesn’t belong to you
You do not own anybody. You have to allow other people to become themselves. In many of our relationships we feel that people belong to us and this is why a lot of relationships don’t last; because everything is about ownership and possession.
When we talk about being single, it can also be a fun experience. If you are single, do not worry, do not be anxious; because the more anxious you are, the more you deviate from your true authentic self.
Would you rather someone love you for who you are not or for who you are?
You should rather someone hate you for who you are than love you for who you are not.
When you let go of the search, everything manifests. Clear your senses and when you see your reflection then you’ll know.
When we talk of being single, it’s a choice. It is not a negative thing, it is not a positive thing. It is whatever you want it to be, whatever you make it. But don’t feel down, don’t feel that you are missing out, because this is all your choice.
You can’t force love.
Why am I single? Reason n.5: Lack of interest
How many of us have time for ourselves? If you don’t have time for yourself, how do you expect to have time for someone else?
A relationship is not a joke, it requires water and sunlight just like a plant does. Constant watering is needed. But many people are not prepared to invest that amount of energy in a relationship.
A lack of interest may also emanate from past relationships. Many people bring old energy into new relationships. Many people see new relationships with old eyes. A lack of interest is where people say, “I don’t need anyone. I’m fine all by myself”.
In our society we praise being independent, we praise being self sufficient. Why you may be single can emanate from a belief system which says, “You, you and you is all you need”.
Why am I single? Reason n.6: You enjoy being single
Of course relationships are filled with love but at the same time some people experience relationships that are solely built on possession.
The best relationship is where you can hold the space and encourage someone to become their greatest version without trying to change who they are.
Why am I single? Reason n.7: You are not ready
You are not ready to give up the kind of freedom that being single offers you.
When you are single you start to think of love more than ever and you start to realize how beautiful it is to have the love connection in full effect.
Being single is not negative. In fact it can be the most uplifting experience in the world because you prepare yourself to meet your reflection. And this takes time because to have it all you have to be it all.
Many people have a personal checklist and because of that they begin to miss out on certain opportunities and encounters because they think too much of the perfect mate. But nobody is perfect.
When you get in a relationship, you don’t have to focus on what isn’t working. The advantage of a great relationship is where two people see the power of focusing on what is working.
A lot of people fail to see that in relationships there are two energies merging together. And because of that, you have to become very clear that is not your job to start changing people, it is not your job to start making people anything other of what they truly are. It is only your job to hold the space and to realize that you choose to be in that relationship.
Once you can both give each other that freedom, the relationship blossoms to the most wonderful thing in the world.
The secret to long lasting relationships is not about what you can take from the other person but it’s about what you can give, what you can share and how you can assist this person in becoming their greatest version.